Day: May 19, 2011
I do! I do!
HAHA. That was supposed to be a joke.
Well anyway. Thank you so much for the encouraging comments, phone calls and emails. You have no idea what it means to me. I’m a homebound, hide-away type person and this whole thing just magnifies that. But to know that I can reach out and there are others going through the same thing and reminding myself that I’m not alone, it’s such a blessing.
I’ve thought alot about what I posted and I just want to clarify that I don’t think antidepressants are wrong or anything. And I don’t even think I’m ashamed about it. I think it’s hard for me because one, I’m a stubborn, strong-willed, independent, get-er-done type person. And none of that matters with this. So it’s hard to swallow my pride and admit I can’t do this on my own. And I also don’t want to rush into anything without looking at all the different options out there.
But I think it’s also hard because I have seen and experienced the depths of despair. God rescued me from a very dark, lonely and painful experience. And honestly, this is nothing compared to that darkness that I experienced. And so sometimes my brain or heart or maybe both can’t seem to understand why I need a pill to help me through this. But most of the time my brain or heart or maybe both really does understand that God is working in me through that pill or whatever I decide is best to help me get some balance. It’s just something I need to trust God with.
Thank you again for your prayers and encouragement. And again, if you’re struggling, please please talk with someone. God is enough and He will be your strength to see you through. But sometimes He uses people or medicine or both to see you through to the other side.
And now for your viewing pleasure. Some random pictures.
I’ve got ants. Not sure where those buggers are coming from.
In addition to the ant you will notice a fish cracker crumb (welcome home ants) and a big gauge in my floor from Caleb throwing his fork. I quit labeling after the grass cause I’d be labeling all night. So to clarify, I know they are coming from outside and I know why they are coming in (because I don’t sweep often), I just don’t know how they are getting in. And excuse me while I go sweep.
Caleb playing with the dog’s water. I love his laugh. The other day I caught him trying to drink out of the bowl like a dog.
Angel eating her snack (cucumbers) outside on the picnic table by herself. Caleb was inside napping but she was content on this day to enjoy the cool breeze and a healthy snack all by herself.
Our garden. We planted tomatoes (regular and cherry), peppers (green, red, jalapeño, salsa and some kind of really hot variety), radishes, onions, carrots, lettuce, cauliflower, beans, peas, cucumbers, watermelon and pumpkin. A bit ambitious ya think?
Princess and Prankster were here for a few days this week visiting. Such a blessing to have them home for a few days. We enjoyed the awesome weather by swinging, playing ball outside and going for a walk.
Love this one of Caleb “flying”!
He looks so tall. Maybe it’s the boots?
We enjoyed a snack of cabbage with a little salt. You have no idea how happy this makes me. Growing up we’d eat raw cabbage and salt with my dad. Love that my kids love it too. After about six pieces Angel was getting a little sick of it. She said, “I think the green kind would be better.”
Caught Caleb listening to Pat’s ipod. When I checked the song it was Everything by Michael Buble. Hey, at least he’s got good taste.
Pat rock climbing at a friend’s house. If I could whistle, I would.
The kiddos with Ronald.
Who says this boy doesn’t have style?
Me and Patrick on “date with a camera part 3”.
And on that
bad hair happy note, I’ll bid you good night. Have a great weekend.
(Clinging to this scripture tonight.)
For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:9-14