Month: June 2012

The next chapter

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I feel like a completely different person. And I’m pretty sure I will never be the same.

After talking with Pat and my siblings, they have encouraged me to start a new blog. One where I can continue to create a scrapbook for our family, but one where I can also share things with Mom and Dad.  It’s time to say goodbye to Grasp the Love. While Ephesians 3:14-21 will forever be my life verse and I will forever cling to the promises of it, I think Mom and Dad are leading me down a new road.

I hope you’ll come along for the journey. You can click on the link below to view the new blog.  It’s pretty simple right now. We’ll continue to customize it as time goes by. And you might even hear from Danelle, Tracy or Jim!

Thanks for reading at Grasp the Love for the past 5 years.  It was actually June of 2007 that I started that blog, so I think it’s appropriate to be ending in June of 2012.

Dear Mom and Dad blog

Tears from heaven

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{Words cannot express our gratitude for your prayers and support during this time. Please know that while we aren’t able to reply to every comment or email, we are reading every single one. We are so thankful for your outpouring of love and for those who are able to share memories of our parents.}

{If you are new to my blog, you may wonder why in the world I’m blogging during this time. If you are not new to my blog, you know that writing is therapeutic for me. And now every morning when I wake up and realize this isn’t a dream, I ask my mom what I’m supposed to do. And she says to me, “Go to God’s Word.” And then she says, “Write.” So I will go to God’s Word and I will write as we walk through this journey. Thank you for walking with us.}

We sat on the rocks along the river. The police continued to tell us that we could leave, that there was nothing else for us to do. But we weren’t leaving. Not while our parents were still on the boat.

We were there for almost four hours. As soon as we got there it started to rain. Not a hard rain, just a light drizzle on and off. One of the officers complained about it starting to rain. But I was thankful for the rain because I imagined it was Jesus weeping along with us.

But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness. Psalm 86:15

While we cried out to God, asking Him why He would choose to take them both in this way, we also trust in the faith that my parents clung to as they lived each day.  That our God is compassionate, loving and faithful.  And so I believe with all that is within me, that God was holding us there, and crying tears for us.

When we finally did leave, as we drove out-of-town, it began to rain a little bit heavier. My brother drove and I sat in the front seat, looking at the sky, wondering what we do next.  The rain came down against the window and again, I thanked Jesus for His tears. For crying with us. For showing us that He was there.

I took this picture.

It wasn’t until later that I looked at it and saw that while I was taking a picture of the rain on the window, in the background there was a church. A cross.

Jesus, we know you are with us. We know that you love us and have compassion on us and are weeping with us. Thank you for your tears from heaven. Hold us now. Help us to cling to the Cross. The Cross that allows us to have the hope of heaven.

Our beloved parents are gone

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I honestly can’t believe I’ve even writing this post. It still all feels like a very bad dream.

Our beloved parents, Grama Susie and Papa, have gone home to be with Jesus. They were on a boat trip, one of many they’ve taken over the years, and were to return home Monday night. We hadn’t been able to get in touch with them and Tuesday morning they didn’t show up for work. I started checking around at that point and talked to the marina where they were supposed to be. Their boat was there. My brother Tracy, sister Danelle, Pat and I got in the car to go there as no one would tell us anything.

We knew deep in our hearts something was very wrong.

We got there about 2:30 pm on Tuesday and the sheriff was there along with investigators. The sheriff told us that mom and dad were gone and that it was carbon monoxide poisoning. They use a generator on their boat to run the air conditioner, tv, microwave, etc and it appears that there was something wrong with the exhaust. They both passed in to the arms of Jesus without pain.

Our hearts are completely broken and I keep telling people we feel very lost right now. Time seems to stand still and there is so much going through our heads. We are so thankful that they went together, on their boat, just like they would have wanted. But we are so angry that they went together, leaving us orphaned.

We are clinging to the hope of Jesus and while we mourn, we don’t mourn as those with no hope. Mom and Dad loved Jesus and we know they are with Him now.  We just miss them so much and can’t believe they are gone.

The Celebration of Life for Mom and Dad (Al and Sue Hellman) will be Sunday, June 17th at 4:30 pm in Chamberlain, SD at the Cedar Shores Resort Convention Center. A memorial fund has been established through any Great Western Bank.

Thank you for your continued prayers. We need them more than ever. Our brother Jim and his wife Leana are still traveling back from South Africa. Please pray specifically for them that they would be able to get home to us quickly so that we can be together.

We love you Mom and Dad and we thank God to have had you as our parents. Our lives will never be the same without you.

Life is hard, but God is good

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{Can’t find words to say tonight, other than this song. Being reminded that God is good, no matter what circumstances we face in this life.}

You turn the key
Then close the door behind you
Drop your bags on the floor
You reach for the light
But there’s darkness deep inside
And you can’t take it anymore

‘Cause sometimes living takes the life out of you
And sometimes living is all you can do

Life is hard, the world is cold
We’re barely young and then we’re old
But every falling tear is always understood
Yes, life is hard, but God is good

You start to cry
‘Cause you’ve been strong for so long
And that’s not how you feel
You try to pray
But there’s nothing left to say
So you just quietly kneel

In the silence of all that you face
God will give you His mercy and grace

Jesus never said
It was an easy road to travel
He only said that you would never be alone
So when your last thread of hope
Begins to come unraveled
Don’t give up, He walks beside you
On this journey home and He knows

Life is hard, the world is cold
We’re barely young and then we’re old
But every falling tear is always understood
Yes, life is hard, but God is good